i have been reading crazedmoms thread, it seems like she is so much like my wife, it scares the hell out of me. i dont know if it is my wifes case, (she says it isnt) but the simularties are pretty close. i truly dont understand why w is needing to leave again, it has been a month and a half since she broke things off with om, is she regretting it i dont know, only she knows, she says not though. she says it was the worst thing she has ever done and regrets it everyday. but those are just words, she has not proven that to me. your mind everyones mind, plays out things that may or may not be the case, is my w crazemom, i dont know, or is what she is telling me the truth that she loves me dosnt want divorced, always wants me in her life, that she just needs time to forgive herself and learn how to live with me again, wants to find a way to come back to me. you know every sitch is different, some s are there all the time and others never see thier s. witch is easier to handle, its like the grass is greener on the other side of the fence thing. i see my w everyday, i have sex with my w often, but i dont get any love from her. she is not depositing anything in my love bank, she is not giving me any security, which is all i want. you know gh you want intimancy with you w, and that is driving you nuts, were all different in what we really want. my w is giving one day and taking many days later, then one day gives, and so on and so on. she knows she is a taker right now, hates that fact but does it anyway. i am just rambling on and on, my head comes up with so much things its is really driving me nuts, i am only human, i try not to let all this way on me, try to take advice from everyone in here, i believe all that has been said to me, but i can not accept it, my sitch is different, wrong, its just like everyone elses, but i still dont believe it. its going to be a long road for me, one i will always travel until its over, and that will be when, either she comes back to me or files for divorce. until that day i will stay on the black train, try to learn along the way, do things for myself, which will be hard and wait and see how it turns out. thanks for helping and reading my messed up life.
