I don't really know the best way to go about this, but sometimes it's ok to let her know your PAIN, but not really your frustration. There is a REALLY fine line between honestly and openly expressing your feelings and putting pressure on her. For the most part, we LBS learn to keep it ALL in because we are notoriously terrible judges of "honesty" versus "pressure" so we figure it's best to not express at all.
This works for most of the process but eventually, you will get to a point where you will need to be able to communicate to her in a more open way, free from blame and other negative emotions towards W.
I think you are in a really bad place to "share" with her right now but maybe soon, opportunity will present itself where you can express to her how you feel.
The bottom line is that what you are feeling is still a reaction to what is going on at the moment, and as such, will pass sooner than later as the sitch changes around you, and YOU change within it.
Just process and then get past this stuff as fast as you can. It sucks to have to do that, but for now, it's probably best. Then please, for God's sake, understand that you were part of a bad marriage, one YOU played a hand in damaging. Accept that BOTH of you made mistakes and try to enjoy the process of making a NEW relationship, free from some of those errors.
GH
P.S. Thanks for making me an honorary body part. I have never been a "spine" before, lol. Seriously, glad I can help.
