I'm not sure I understand. You seem to be saying that you've lost your "coolness" with her but you still have it with other's correct? Then you say she sees you talking to others in public and she's smiling, as if she likes that. Basically what she is saying, if I have it right, is that you've lost yourself, the self that she's attracted to, in your relationship, right? If so, then it seems like you (like me) need to work on going back to being THAT man even in her presence. That doesn't sound like you need to "only focus on her" as much as it means you need to "only focus on YOU".
