thanks for the reply. im sorry for not explaining what went wrong with our relationship. i was very controling and jealous type. during our marriage seminar we figured it out(and i have made great leaps to change that). when we spend time together she is distant at first and then opens up later. that is the most difficult part. everytime i take one foot forward i end up taking two back. i know i have made big improvements on my part towards change(which has made me a better person with or without her). i guess im at the point to where i just want to give up, i dont want too but it hurts so much i just want to stop hurting(wish she could feel my pain, i know i never made her feel like this). i know for a fact if i give up she will also. so im reluctant. you know she says she enjoys my company and loves me but why then wont she honestly work towards fixing our m. all she will say is she dos not want a divorce at this time. its like she has a wall built up that she will take me to but she wont let me help her climb over it. i guess i have to climb over it and wait and she if she follows. i have spent so much time and money on understanding what went wrong and how to fix it. i just wish she would trust me and follow suit. man this hurts im so confussed on what to do it drives me crazy. i dont eat(lost 60 ilbs in last two months) sleep, every second of every day i think of her(which i know i shouldnt but i cant help not too)
