It is a way I try to keep my sanity. And, I would love to let him back in-but I'm not so sure he wants back in. I have not been able to help him with his goals as you suggested b/c I don't think I really know what they are...or if I ever did. Past the 'life with you, growing old together' stuff, and don't get me wrong, I am SO fortunate to hear that-(although it's still somewhat hard to 100% believe)--but past that, I really don't know what he wants-or who he is.
I've stopped worrying about it so much tho, and that too has helped. I will be here if/when he is ready.
A note about the stay-at-home Mom...I was one for ~2 years, left a high-stress, high-optempo, high-responsibility career to be a Mom. Don't regret the decision at all, and I really can relate to what you said about how they tend to lose themselves...I sure did.
Ironically however, we moved-I went back to work full time (and within 2 weeks hated my job!) lived in a hotel for 30 days until we bought a house-arranged for and put the kids back into full time daycare-ALL within the span of about 2 months....then H left for a year deployment overseas. I still had not unpacked anything but a few pots/pans and our clothes. And I was alone. (oh, don't forget about the 2 dogs-and no fenced back yard!!!)
It sounds like such a recipie for WAW doesn't it? Based on some stories I've heard, you could almost bet I would have been the one that cheated....I have wanted to ask H for a while, but won't, what gave HIM the right to cheat when I was the one left with all the family responsibility/new house/job/no freinds....no family...and he was overseas with only himself to look after.(?) I know his job came with a certain amount of stress, but c'mon....
