W31, OM 20 (actually now 21!) Part III

[RBinBR]

I believe that my sitch is unique in that I have the power to file for divorce in my marriage, but my wife does not (due to the unique Louisiana Covenant Marriage that we have [let me know if you're new to my sitch and want more info]).

Over the past several weeks, my Sunday School class has been discussing the Biblical role of husband and wife in marriage, and we were studying Ephesians 5 (which I have read many times, of course). All of a sudden it hit me ... I need to "be Christ" in our marriage. Of course, I've read In His Steps and I've asked "what would Jesus do," but always in the context of "what would Jesus do if he were me?" But he's not me!

I realized that Christ lets us sin. He told Judas at the Last Supper, "What you do, do quickly." He gives us the free will to sin. When the Israelites told the prophet Samuel that they wanted a king, God told them that they were sinning and would regret it, but then he said, "OK, I'll give you a king."

It would be wrong of me to continue to hold my W in this marriage against her will. I told her all this this morning and told her that she could have the divorce she wanted. A big part of me thought that she would say that she didn't want it, but that's not what she said at all.

She said that, if we were to have anything together in the future, she didn't see how it could be in the context of this marriage, and she thought ending it was best.

W was very tearful, saying that I don't know the torment that she's gone through, and how much it kills her every time she looks at D4's face. She didn't understand how I could be so calm about it, and I told her that it's because I'm following God's will for my life and I know that he will bless me as a result.

Anyway, we talked for an hour and a lot more was said, so I'll have to post more later. I do feel very good though. It went really well.