PL, I do wish she wanted to do more than snuggle, but it was good. She actually thanked me the next morning for snuggling and tickling her and allowing her her to stay over.
The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth." (Psalm 145:18)
Yesterday, W called me for the first time since Sunday, and she actually called twice about stuff that it wasn't absolutely necessary for us to talk about. She then tried to ask to bring something by the apartment, but I asked her to leave it at her mother's instead. When we got to MIL's house much later, she was there, and she complimented me on my new shirt.
It doesn't sound like much, and I've seen plenty of people on these boards read too much into little actions of their WAS's, but the little things put together yesterday told me that she was missing me. How much? Ah, who knows? But yesterday felt good.
The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth." (Psalm 145:18)
Hi RB, Of course those are positive things. Those are the baby steps to look for, and you got a few! Hang in there! Slow but steady....
PositivelyListening ************************************** When one door of happiness closes, another one opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us. - Helen Keller
Thanks, BI and PL. Yesterday morning and the previous evening was one of the few times in the last two weeks that I've felt positive about my sitch.
A big part of me is disappointed that OM has been gone for almost 3 weeks now and she still shows no sign of putting him out of her life. I really thought she would use his absence to change her life. If that is happening, it's much more slowly than I would have anticipated or liked. I know that it was wrong for me to get my expectations up, but I'm losing patience.
The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth." (Psalm 145:18)
Well, patience is the thing, isn't it? Three weeks is a VERY short time. Think of that as the beginning for her. And that's only if she is having NO contact. It is possible he is still calling or writing to her. She will probably need 6 months with no contact to really get her head straight. So patience is the thing.
I hope I have not made you feel worse. My H is not even in the place of realizing there is a problem. He thinks his life is hunky dory and I am the only problem he's got - get rid of me, problem solved. It sucks. So you are in a much better situation than I am, if that makes you feel any better! But patience is the key! And how do you maintain patience and PMA? GAL, that's how! What are you going to do for yourself today?
Rooting for you RB
PositivelyListening ************************************** When one door of happiness closes, another one opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us. - Helen Keller
Well, yes, PL, I know that they are still talking and emailing, etc, so there is still lots of contact and that will continue until she decides to end it (or he does).
I just don't know where I'm going to be when that happens. The A is now approaching its 1-year mark. We've only been married 6 years, and one of those has been with her in an affair.
I spent a lot of time yesterday with an attractive woman who seemed to enjoy my company as much as I enjoyed hers. It wasn't a "date", but it was really fun and I want to be able to do more of that, and I'm not willing to wait forever.
I'm getting close to the filing point, and I'm cool with that.
The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth." (Psalm 145:18)
RB, honey, if I had the company of an attentive, attractive male friend I would be closer to throwing in the towel too. Watch out and be vigilant about your own temptations - satan wants nothing better than to destroy your marriage, you know that.
Granted, your W is playing a large part in it, and in your growing frustration. Just back up and try to gain some more perspective. I certainly cannot blame you at all. The way my marriage was before, if I had had the opportunity, I easily could have been the one having an A.
Just wanted to pop in with a splash of cold water on you to make sure you're doing the right things here. No judgment, I promise.
Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Is 43:18-19
If it seems slow in coming, wait. It's on its way. It will come right on time. Hab 2:3
Thanks, BI. Trust me when I say that I won't do anything without a lot of prayer.
I will say, though, that I believe my marriage has already been destroyed. I do not believe that I will be sinning if I decide to formally end what no longer exists in fact.
I had long made this time a kind of deadline for me. I'm starting a new life, and I'm not going to live my life wishing things were different. I'm going forward. If my W wants to start a new life as well, I'm open to that. Since she's not, it's really only a matter of timing.
The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth." (Psalm 145:18)
