When the R is humming along then there doesn't need to be some big buildup of EC before sex. However, when things stink I do need to establish the EC before the sex.
That's interesting Karen. I'd say I'm the opposite. When the R is humming along, I feel like the EC is a lot easier to really feel and the sex is better. When the R is stagnant, I'd rather just skip the EC and get to the sex. Maybe because, like I stated before, the EC doesn't seem as "true" when we are not meshing. Too artificial. That's why I think some of those intimacy encounters may backfire with couples that don't have a solid R to begin with. If I'm feelin the love for H, and vice versa, the intimacy encounters would be wonderful, but usually, one or both of us are feeling stressed about the R.
