Anyway, what UD is saying is a much better way of saying what I was trying to get at. I was trying to see if I could tell if the WAY you were validating may be coming off as condescending even if you didn't intend it to be.
Again, I agree with UD in that if she can sense, because of body language, the words you choose, your tone, whatever, that you are merely placating her to expidite the conversation, then she will react that way. True validation is heartfelt and without judgment...oh, and often VERY hard to pull off if they're saying venomous crap that you 100% don't agree with.
Also, to continue the "agree-fest", I agree that your W could just be taking ANY attempt you make at validating her and using it agaist you. Since you can't really control that, I guess we're left examining your methods more...
GH
P.S. Mama, you want us to move this to muddle's thread?
