Hey there, Mama. Hang in there, it gets really tough at times. I understand fully. Ugh.
So, how are ya doing today. Nice that he complimented you...stay detached, though. So, if he wants to work on the M, you finally have a verbal committment? YAY!!! So, can you two start talking about how to address the sex issue? Do you think you're at that stage yet? Maybe a few more weeks of good vibes and nice, peaceful, neutral times together are in order to build that "feel good" foundation. It's kinda where I'm at now. Does wonders.
Glad you managed to have a great weekend. Lots of effort on your part, I imagine, to reign in your feelings and put it aside for a good time for your family. Remember, when you talk to H, and he expresses his views about sex, validate. Let him know it's common, but understand and validate his feelings. He feels that you weren't into him, that's gotta hurt really badly. It's probably gonna take time for him to come around on that one.
Now, let's get to the good part...YOU. What are some things you're doing for yourself this summer? Your work ended, what's going on with kids and other stuff, activities. How about doing stuff for you? Shopping, working out, etc. You mentioned body image, I understand this. It also seems that H didn't make you feel that way, you did (or mostly you?). Anyway, how can you tackle that, and find ways to improve your body image? I know it's hard after kids, getting older, etc. BUT, you gotta get that back, not just for H or M, but for YOU. You want to feel good about your body, mind and everything all the time. Some things I did for myself: 1) working out. I know it's hard for you, but how about an early morning walk or bargaining with H to take care of the kids while you go out for 30 min for a nice vigorous walk, or go with the family. Good for all. Time to gather thoughts or spend time talking with H and kids. Honestly, the exercise has been the BEST thing for me these months. 2) Some new clothes, or something. I'm not a shopper AT ALL, but it's amazing what you can do at thrift stores...some pretty cool stuff there. Whatever floats your boat and isn't too much cash--nailpolish, hair stuff, makeup, whatever. Just remember, make yourself feel good, and it radiates.
How about getting out with friends? Anything interesting going on for the summer? Push yourself--feels like a rut at times, but with effort, you can push yourself out and to feeling good again. This will rejuvenate the DB efforts too.
