Ok, Saturday: H came home at midnight. As you all know I was furious. I was a bad DB'er. I told him I figured out his pattern. He stays out late every other Saturday - OW has a kid, but is not married, that is probably when she is with her Dad. He said that was not true (LIE - looked like a deer caught in the headlights). I also asked him why his clothes (he wears a uniform to work) didn't smell like smoke if he was supposedly in a bar - had no answer. (Because of online banking I know he spent $ at target earlier in the day, so he probably bought something to wear). I also told him that I am not going to put up with the lying anymore - he has no respect for me or the kids - he said that is not true blah, blah, blah.... Went to bed.
Sunday morning: we are supposed to go out of town with my family, I wasn't in the mood to go. Kids really wanted to so I didn't want to let them down. Told H we needed to talk. I told him I can't live like this anymore. If he wants to go, then go. He said he wanted to stay married. I said why? Is it cause you can't afford to leave? He said no, he loves his family. He said our problem was our sex life, or lack of it. I tried to explain that lots of couples with small children have a lacking sex life as there is usually always someone wanting to sleep with us, etc. I told him ALL couples have problems of one kind or another NO ONE's life is perfect. I told him part of my problem with intimacy was a very poor body image as I felt fat and uncomfortable. He said I wasn't fat that I just wasn't into him. I asked him if he was now a mind reader. We both agreed to work on our relationship but I told him it will never work when there are 3 people involved. Of course he denied OW and said he just wants to go out and drink with his friends, said he won't do it anymore (Where have I heard that before?) On a positive note, when he comes home from these rendevous he is always totally blasted - so how much fun can they be having?
Anyway, went out of town I bit my tongue and had a good time. We even held hands while taking a walk. (I initiated )
Tuesday: he came home from work and was very nice and pleasant - thanking me for all that I do around here.
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