Since last week, when H put the brakes on us moving forward, we’ve both been a whole lotta “emotional”. He’s dealing with this situation with me and another phase of things with OW (they have been communicating, but he says she’s at the point of not wanting to talk to him anymore) Both of us are telling him basically we feel like fading into the woodwork. Now my reactions have been up and down. I feel threatened by her, and insignificant (taking it all personally). And my head also tells me to go back to DB basics and be his friend, and so I have recommended some books and stuff to him, including “After the Affair” and “DB”- because he was open to it. (He asked) And says he doesn’t want me to jump to conclusions, he just needs space to deal with himself, then he’ll address more with me.
I understand this in my head, and yet, I am feeling resentful and even apathetic at times. Angry too. I’m frustrated with ME most of all, wish I could turn off the feelings for awhile cause they’re getting in the way of me doing what my head tells me is right. I think the best way to deal with this is rereading DB (which I am) and dimness, but how do I exercise the bad feelings? I am really feeling bad about how I have been with him (showing my frustration and hurt a bit) and I don’t want to do more damage.
