I am trying to keep a PMA. Been doing quite well, working on "Me" projects and generally "Acting As If". Left H alone. He made contact today to say he's back "from the dead", doing much better, crying less and feeling better overall. He said he's ready to "be better about stuff- ready to take more of US on, open things up, wants to talk again soon, etc...".
He really did sound better. He called right after he emailed me and at the end of the conversation he asked how he "did" in the conversation - ie was he considerate of me and responsive... like he was asking me for a verbal "comment card"! He is trying. I really see it.
He still speaks rather cryptically, like in the phrase above, and I am left wondering, HUH???
He asked if we're still on for Sunday night (my birthday) and that he's broke but still wants to spend time with me" - I know he's trying. BUT. I still don't feel so special, you know? He compliments me a lot, but I still sit here wondering... "oh, you're broke because you spent 9 months shmoozing the girlfriend and now I get the leftovers." It has nothing to do with money, it's the expectation of "Nothing much" that he seems to prep me for.
It's a process and I'm sure he doesn't even clue in yet that he has some winnning me back to do too.
