Someone should lock me up so I don't do any more damage.
Had an awful night. Can't even tell you how disappointed I am in myself! I went on the offensive over that song on H's CD because I was hurt it wasn't about US, told him he was pretty insensitive if it was about her, and he left it for me. I nkow I'm trying to be open minded and all, but that was too much!He just didn't explain anything about it first, is all.
He was actually trying to do a nice thing for me, (with poor judgement, yes) but I should have been more in control of myself. I know better!
I apologized, he apologized, we both cried, etc... It hasn't been like that in while.
Worst thing was that it has set off a huge round of guilt and self pity and grief in him, and I didn't meant that... yuck. From the things he was saying, I do believe that he is really sorry, really doesn't want to hurt me anymore, and doesn't want to go back to her. I think he's just lost and doesn't know how to go about any of this. I don't know if he's still seeing his counselor (money is tight).
Now I have to think about how to turn this around? I don't want to back off too much, but I don't want to make it worse. At the ery least, I have to put myself on a short leash!
