Hey JJ, I do wish us both good luck. I didnt sound like a bull in a china shop I hope. There's a point you get where I guess I'm not afraid of what he's going to say and I just asked it outright. Maybe that's not dbing correctly, but it is a 180.
H and I really have the same fear. We'll divorce, he'll get his act together, and it will be to late. I'll have moved on.
Crisis causes change. That's why I became a different person. I know we're both scared that the only thing that will cause his changes is me giving up on him and ending it.
I remind myself that nothing is final when it comes to feelings. You can create new beginnings from nothing. It's hard, but you can do it.
I guess I don't see the other person as a huge thing. Yet it is a huge thing as far as our marriage is concerned. I mean that's the whole point of a marriage. It's h and wife, not h, wife, and his OW. It's a HUGE roadblock. In every way we could we've grown closer, but with her there, there's only so close I can get. Am viewing this wrong. I don't worry about her, and I really do forgive him, but that has to end for anything to become of us ever.
Take care of yourself. You're much further ahead of me, she's back in the house with you. It's so sad, he and I have completly switched places. He is where I once was in all this. So I know he has to find the answers on himself, it's just so hard to try to standby and watch and wait.
Take care all.
[This message has been edited by Saturnh (edited 09-12-2001).]
