There are significant differences between NM and GH...
-- NM is much more willing to explore, define, and uphold some boundaries, even if she does change her boundaries, she generally owns those changes as a result of her choices
-- NM is not living with SO, SO has not committed to any kind of R with her
I also seriously doubt that NM really means that this needs to be on SO's timetable. What she likely means is that her timetable right now includes more time to see what happens with SO. She also understands the whole annoying coworker analogy and so is not pursuing SO...
NM -- **GREAT JOB** communicating about your weirdness :-) I bet it did catch him off guard. It is great when you can report on yourself without trying to predict and/or manage his response to your report. That, actually, allows for increased intimacy because it allows you to be much more authentic in any R between you and SO.
