That's just it GH - I WANT TO CHANGE IT. I think back to 3-4 years ago, I wanted things to change THEN, only I was so clueless. I thought HE had to be the one to change. I feel ridiculous even saying that out loud.
It's so hard...trying to change a decade of our combined negative behaviors - even if you KNOW the behavior isn't working. Kind of like quitting smoking. Something else I've never been able to accomplish - and it scares me. If I can't quit smoking, knowing that it can KILL me, how the hell will modifying my negative behavior be any easier? Or will I slack off? God, I hope not.
Although, in some instances, like 180's - I've find myself having FUN with it. I'm really a spontaneous fun-loving, easy go lucky person. Even if it doesn't come across here, lol, and even with 3 little kids - lol. So, trying to come up with different things, it's fun to me. Even if just for shock value. Is that bad? Even if it is, I still think, OK - what can I do next? He, however, still seems to do the same things, say the same things over & over. It's almost a little annoying. Like OK, dude, hello -it's not working! Do something different! SAY something different! And you guys say I *know* him - well, he's pretty steady as they come. I'm trying to knock him out of the routine.
