Hi guys, I'd like to butt in here for a moment. Jamesjohn, you do sound like you're doing much better, in spite of the setbacks. It's almost as if you are getting more and more centred and your w, as a result, is flailing around in circles. Keep doing what you're doing, but as Kent says, live life.
I have a question. My state of affairs is going quite well these days, but my sister took a deep dive into the mlc goo about 6-8 months ago, has had an obsessive affair with a less than savoury character and she has left my bil (doctor, has time managment and other sorts of human flaws, but basically a good guy). He's so filled with anger and resentment over her behaviour. Now the affair has cooled, and she's not come back home and I think that's why he's so p**sed off, but it's not getting him anywhere. He's become very very negative, and I've been trying to tell him to see a lawyer, because my sis is going to get a legal separation so she can have the kids live with her now. He's been shouldering most of the parenting plus a 70-hour-a-week job (she doesn't work). I'm asking you because you're guys and have been through this. How do I get my bil to calm down, stop reacting, etc. Should I pull a 180 and tell him maybe he should give up? I've been trying to tell him his kids need him (he's been talkign about how he's already dead, so he might as well work himself into an early grave). Maybe I should do the opposite? My sister, I realize, is quite beyond any talks, etc. at the moment. Should I try the same on her? Maybe agree with her that it was all a waste of time? The marriage I mean? I've asked also on Snodderly's thread for advice, but I'd welcome you guy's perspectives. Thanks.
