Kent - I think you're right about the hard work. But, then again, to me, maybe "hard" ain't the right word for it. Sorta takes the feeling of fun out of it! Maybe it should be more like "dedicated" work. "Hard" puts into my mind something that's very difficult, too serious, and toilsome (is that a real word?!). Does that make any sense to you? Just kinda thinking out loud, but it seems to me like sometimes people tend to take life too grimly and seriously. I think the more we lighten up and have fun with things, the better life we have. We create more pleasant memories for people to associate with being around us. I know this can't apply in every situation at all times, but the more it happens, the better. I lost this dedication in the past, and so did my W. This kinda relates to someting she and I talked about last night. "finding" time to do some things versus "making" the time. Last night, we "made" time to have a date and go to the movies. We both had other things we could have done, but we "dedicated" ourselves, especially her, to do this important thing for "us". I guess where I'm heading with this is that I'm trying to create new and pleasant memories with my W, things for her to look at, and remind her that she has good reasons to enjoy being with me. To be more comfortable with me. It seems that as we're doing this, it's becoming easier to deal with the "hard" stuff, things that have been unpleasant to deal with in the past. Maybe it goes back to the idea of making your spouse your best friend.
JJ
Read about Divorce Busting® Telephone Coaching here!
