Quote: Here, I was narrow-mindedly defining growth only in the context of our R.
Not to sound like a pitch man for PM, especially since I have not really read much of it, this is where there are a LOT of similarities between it and DB. They both deal with the understanding that growth OUTSIDE the context of the marriage is helpful and necessary in promoting growth INSIDE the marriage. Not to say that there needs to be "extramarital" things going on, but just, as DB says, GAL, things that we, as individuals, want, need and get from the world at large and then share with out spouses.
In this sense, I see that my W has grown a great deal. She has found that she needs to experience life in it's entirety and won't settle for living 24/7 in the bubble of our marriage. The problem is that she didn't/doesn't realize that you CAN have it all. You CAN have a full life WITHIN the context of a marriage, you just have to want to and then you have to learn how to. I think it's this last "learning how to" part I fear my W will lag behind on because she won't read or see anyone but you know what, I will lead by example I guess and in true DB fashion, hope that is enough to affect REAL change.
