Re the *incident* -- hey, in my book, expressing some anger over the couch thing is better than nothing. WTF was she thinking? How could she treat you that way??? I'm glad you apologized for how you expressed the anger rather than the anger itself, lol. It was a very inappropriate choice for her to make. Maybe even PA on her part. Yes, you could have been more direct about not wanting it to happen in the first place. Then again, you SAID you weren't comfortable with it, while refusing to make the decision for her. That doesn't seem to be like such a bad thing.
Anyway, I'm glad you are liking the book. I think you can think of the recommendation not to be best friends as a recommendation not to be joined at the hip and totally enmeshed. You seem to have gotten that from it as well.
I'm sorry that the DUI case is not looking great. It might, though, help to simply acknowledge to yourself that drunk driving is not acceptable and should have significant consequences. It sucks maybe that some people luck out and get off too easy. It would have been nice if your W had gotten lucky. But, what she did was really not OK. I know it makes life harder, but poor choices have consequences. It is easy to feel alot of anger and rage when these bad consequences follow bad choices, but much of that is likely projection because the anger is really toward the original bad choice and its maker...
I doubt your W would take very kindly to you sharing such a perspective, but it may help you through this.
