Thanks ladies! I'm OK. I'm taking it one day at a time. Today is definitely much better. I'm not sure why there can be such a change in affects depending on the day. I am resolved to be done with the chemicals.
I do stay active but not much of an athlete. I have half a dozen active projects at home plus the kids and their activities.
Gonna get away for a couple of days in a few weeks. Not sure where but I'm thinking about taking oldest son camping for a few days.
This BB has really exploded the past month or so. The NC forum has become incredibly busy. I find myself slipping further and further away from posting.
Well another great weekend of slaving around the money pit. Seems that the ill effects of the anti-deps are finally wearing off.
Thinkin I should start drinking again just so I can have something wicked to hold onto.
I got a wedding invite from an old friend of mine. 3rd go round for her. How can anyone possibly even consider it. What do you get for a wedding present in such a circumstance.
I actually made it through the weekend with no (zero) deep thoughts about anything. just work in the garden and in the shop. I perused the NC board breifly. Man is it smokin. I have no energy to keep up with it anymore. Perhaps this is a good sign. Imagine a normal life again. Ahhhhh!
My thoughts exactly, WG!! Or Kent, what about the Keeping Love Alive Study Kit?
Glad to hear you are doing so much better!
I am moving myself officially to this "department" of the BB. Things are moving along, a bump here and there, but I am working hard at keeping the changes going in me.
Kent - I'm definitely with you on this one. My parents divorced when I was 7 (it was 2nd marriage for both), mother died when I was nine. Dad had remarried by then to a woman with 7 children - They had a terrible relationship -they are now divorced and I have no contact with either of them VERY unhealthy situation!! - I learned from that environment exactly what I did not want to do or become.
At times I think this makes me try too hard -if that's possible. By this I mean, my desire for a healthy, harmonious family might cause/have caused me to overfunction in my own marriage relationship. I refuse to become what I was taught by the examples of my elders!
I will educate any children I may have in what healthy relationsips are, and how to recognize unhealthy ones.
You seem to be doing better, by the way! Glad to hear it!!
B
[This message has been edited by biv_b (edited 05-09-2001).]
Sorry to hear about the tingle in your toes and the dizzy spells, it could be from 'withdrawl' I get like that (dizzy) after haven taken pain killers-almost like a hangover...I am not a MD so you should ask your doc just to rule out anything else.
As for your question about our parents, that is interesting, somewhere in another post of mine (no idea which topic, but it was here on DB) I talked about my parents and their marriage. It was the only example I had of marriage when I was growing up, we didn't live near any other family (aunts, uncles, grandparents etc.) and moved every 2-4 years. The main thing I remember from my parents is their loyalty to each other, their committment to the marriage and family. They are still in love and yet both admit their marriage is not perfect and takes a lot of work. They believe in marriage counseling and went to Marriage Encounter when I was a kid, it helped them tremendously. Whenever there was a problem between them, we (the kids) pretty much knew it, they would address the issue (sometimes loudly-LOL) and then work through it. There was always a 'make-up' period. I realize that they still struggle with their issues, nothing is perfect, and like my mom says; 'he may be a butthead sometimes, but he's MY butthead'.
I assumed that my marriage would be much the same. I was wrong. You know what happens when you ASS-U-ME. I had their example to go by and that's what I thought I had. Fidelity and loyalty above all else and committment not taken lightly. I also assumed that H and I would always be able to talk to each other. Got that one wrong too. H talked too little and I too much.
I have learned to accept that my marriage is not like anyone elses and never will be. But that is does have the potential to be what ever I and my H want it to be.
My parents and I are close, we talk openly about a lot of things, they do know H and I are having 'rough times' (no details-don't want them to feel they have to defend their baby and besides I feel it would ruin their relationship with H if they knew) and they asked a while ago if we were getting counseling. They told us it helped them when I was a kid, and how they found their way back to each other because at one point they were thinking they didn't love each other any more.
Unrealistic expectations. That can work either way.
Looks Like I have come full circle with this thread.
Our last C session is coming up in a week. W expressed a desire to end the sessions. At this point, I must agree.
We both know what the issues are. We both are working to keep love alive. We are both working on our own personal lives and goals. WE are both enjoying each others company again.
I am zoloft free now and finally feeling that I am free of the side effects. My anxiety is gone.
Like all others here, I am looking forward to getting back to a life free of OR obsession. A new life where I understand my nature and tendancies and can overcome all of them.
I have read "The way of the peaceful Warrior" and I feel that I am the peaceful warrior. For the first time in my life, I feel at peace.
OK lets start a pool on how long it lasts. Kent will tke 2 squares.
