Greg, Thanks for dropping in. I here what you are saying and as usual, you are right. Part of my self monitoring is to make sure I send the right signals to W that I want her to explore new avenues, new experiences. In my 20's and early 30's, I did everything I dreamed of and plenty more. By the time I married, all I really wanted was a family. My W had the opposite situation in her 20's. She never got to experience total freedom. In the past I have been guilty of doing too much for W. I have and continue to work on this issue.
We just came back from dinner togather. Had an OR talk that was pretty beneficial. We decided to keep seeing the C every couple of months or so for the near term to keep a safe time for OR adjustment. W's biggest concern is that I will hold her back. She feels guilty when she leaves me at home with the kids. I pretty much told her that any perception that I resented her doing stuff for herself was her misperception. I was doing what I wanted by being home with the family. That was my choice. I went on to tell her that I expected her to make herself happy and that the health of our relationship depended on it.
I have been aprehensive for the past few days about this upcoming C session. Not sure of all the reasons. I feel somewhat releived tonight as we have actually managed to have a serious OR conversation without tears.
Greg, I'll never forget the support you provided me at the darkest moments in my life. Thanks again!
Me2,
Be patient lady. Patient with H and patient with yourself. Keep your expectations realistic. Question every negative feeling as they start. It is lots of work, but worth it. I've been where you are now. I remember the anxiety. I even still get twinges.
I'll bet Greg, Cliff, Tom, Patience and others still get twinges as well. I think this is what growth is all about. As we get used to dealing with our own feelings we naturally get better at it. Give your H a hug for me. Just don't tell him.
