Glad you had a good weekend at the beach. Sorry to hear about the agument when you got back. I remember somewhere in MWD's KLA CD's she talked about triggers. Home and the bed are a tigger for you & H. Maybe next time you are going away, you could invite H to your bed and while you are still away, ask if the invitation could be reciprocated. If your in a hotel/motel room is there really a sense of the marital bed vs. the daybed? It's just a bed. But maybe you were at a place that has a history with you and there is a sense of the marital bed.
I asked him about it while we were at the beach this weekend. The kids were playing in the water and H and I were in our beach chairs and I just asked him "Is that codependent book yours?" He said "Yeah, it's just some research I'm doing". I said "Oh. What does codependent mean anyway?" He said "That's what I'm learning, but it's basically someone who is so focused on other people's problems that they never address their own." I pretended I didn't suspect he was talking about me and I asked him a couple more simple questions and then just let it drop. Apparently, he's trying to diagnose me.
The fact that H is reading this book and opened up and answered your questions is a good sign. Keeping with the pretending not to suspect that he is diagnosing you, I'd continue asking general, open-ended questions about the book. This could provide you with insight into what he is thinking, but be careful not to react to what he says.
