Quote: I guess the other thing to identify in the poem is which woman is which. You assume the "fat" one is you but it COULD be her since it's that one that is getting "wronged" in the poem and she probably perceives herself in that role. Very complicated this all is as Yoda would say.
Oh no, I think there is no question that she means the fat one to be me: A. I'm fat. B. When my H and married, we agreed that neither of us liked me fat, and I would lose weight. He has made my life of the past nine years a life of leisure and free time, so that if I HAD been diligent, I could have done WAY more (I've lost 62 pounds -- but I have another 130 to go..) One of the main major reasons he fell out of love with me is my weight... so there is no question I'm the fat one... (And, she does NOT feel wronged; she feels (or did, dunno if she still does now) she is wronging ME, but choosing to do so.
And, one of the things he loves about her is she is not fat, she has a very good, very attractive figure. As he has always said, and has been saying in relation to her ({wryly} as she proves to be less than the perfect mate he first saw her as) he can stand the "bitch from h-ll" personality as long a the body is acceptable -- or he can deal with an overweight body if the personality is feminine and attractive... I struck out on both counts (by his lights). I actually have a bright and bubbly personality -- just too often masculine / direct / aggressive for him. I have been quite content to tone down my "masculine' side -- and he admits have done a great deal of work on it -- just that, combined with my weight -- too little, too late.
(By way of showing the personality thing... I would have edited it out, but for demonstration purposes... I started this message with "oh no" -- which is unnecessary and not particularly gracious... Instead of starting out with something delicate like: "I could see how that might be confusing..." I'm more direct. He has asked me, all along, to learn to use " delicacy and precision" in dealing with him or doing things in front of him. I do not actually conisder that an unreasonable request / demand, and I chose to try to do it for myself; but I was not diligent is making the changes... (I tend toward laziness {G})
He's a strange man, but that's okay, cause I'm a strange woman. I have always been content/willing to be working toward 'making myself over' (to a degree) to suit him. He suits me to a "t"!
My thread is under the Infidelity/Adultery section and is called Mea Maxima Culpa -- but I can't get the link to work.
