Quote: maybe I should clarify about that 'poem" -- we're NOT particularly into BDSM or collaring or all that (although it appears as if the lizard is into that, to a much greater extent!) but we wholly support and are committed to the H being the leader of the family; the wife being willingly subordinate to him in most things.
Um...I don't really know what to say to that. The poem was a little, well VERY strange to me but with this disclaimer, I guess it's not so strange to you. I don't mean to pass judgment but I think your marriage has dynamics going on that make giving advice, or at least advice based on DB and such, a little hard.
Also, when you say "WE" wholly support and are committed to the H being the leader of the family... I can't help but to immediately have thought you were referring to you and OW, not you and H because it seems obvious that H would support that. WERE you referring to her?
Also, if I am to cast aside my puzzlement at what all this means in terms of my advice to you, and just try to actually give you some, I would start with the poem. Do you take that as OW trying to tell you why H is "leaving" you? That you are fat and not submissive enough? Also, in the end, it suggests that the person seeking advice (H) is a fool for doing what he seeks to do, does it not? Strange for OW to suggest this.
As for the financial stuff, I agree that again, it complicates things as far as advice goes because there seems to be a lot more going on that is very specific to your life that generic advice just doesn't do justice to.
