Positively new thread - how do you deal with this?

[PositivelyListening]

I am disturbed about this second house thing with my H. Trying to decide if I am just being stubborn and controlling, or smart and careful by taking a stand. Our situation is not ideal right now, so I am muddled. I wouldn't enter into business with someone who was a liar and a cheat. H wants me to separate the two worlds, personal and business. They are part of a whole person, a whole relationship, to me. I realize by enforcing a boundary about a "whole marriage" before we move forward with financial commitments could force his decision to end the M because he is not ready to end the A and right now does not want to pursue a healthy M with me as far as I can tell. I am willing to wait, do nothing for now, but H may see this as a control issue or an ultimatum to end the A. And obviously he can not force himself to love me if he doesn't want to and isn't willing to try to restore our M. So why would I want him in my life under those circumstances? Because it could change when the fog lifts, and he will feel like I was agreeable and was his friend and am still there. That feels so tenuous and risky. Any insights would be appreciated. Maybe I just need more information about how he thinks this will work. I think he wants the business with no personal, as he has said all along. I think the loss of the business aspect of our partnership is a logical consequence/outcome when trust has been broken. But of course I have not ended ALL contact, so right now we are trying to figure out what could work. I want it ALL, but should I accept what's available in the interim? D says it doesn't matter if we go ahead with another house, we will both be on the title so he can't really do anything without my agreement. I guess for me, if you can't trust someone, how can you trust them? I dunno. Your thoughts on this?