Quote: Maybe he just has to learn that lesson one more time, just like I have to learn this walk-away syndrome and learn to accept it without judgement I don't know how to do that. Honestly, it just feels wrong. It doesn't fit my values. I can accept that he is hurting, and have compassion. But I don't think I will ever be able to accept the behavior of a secret affair or a walk-away choice as OK, even if I can understand how it happens.
Ok, but you have to accept this if you are ever to reconcile (and I know you are saying that you may not be able to). I think what you are failing to accept is that he is his own person, out of your control. You need to accept that he is a human being and as thus, makes mistakes. This affair is NOT who he is, but rather a decision he made. As in all decisions, one can either be proud of it, or eventually have regret about it. Someone who commits a crime but never has remorse for it is worse, both literally and morally, than someone who repents their crimes/sins and works to make themselves right.
I agree that his decisions don't match your morals right now but don't make the mistake of assuming his FUTURE decisions will not.
To me, that is how you learn to accept this. You understand that it's merely a decision, one you disagree with but that does not define him totally as a man...yet.
