Thanks everyone for the replies. Accept his limitations and filter out what isn't good. I do accept his limitations, I do accept him for who he is, I have a problem with my filter, it's a bit clogged.
As for PMA, it disappears from time to time, I'm not perfect and I'm not particularly good at putting on a false front i.e acting fine all the time.
However, I'm also like the kids toy, the one with the weighted bottom so that when you hit it from any angle, it bounces back to centre.
Michele I write my pent up frustrations, that is my way of dealing with myself, making myself think. Yes, I am aware that my post is full of ways I used to talk about my situation. However, it's not a replica of my behaviour. You may say though that it is evidence of my thinking.
Perhaps it is. Yes, he wants to please me and yes he wants to love me. Yes, I need to talk. I talk to other people and am good at building relationships. I do behave really well, am a kind and loving friend, I can talk objectively and keep all emotions under control. Do I criticise? Yes, but in a kind and loving way. I don't slam criticisms at him. Even when we end up in a fight, I don't approach the subject accusingly, I do it quietly and objectively and aim to discuss what happened so that the problem can be resolved.
I'm human, when I'm hurt and those hurts pile up on a daily basis, I can't always walk away as if they just don't matter.
I do things differently, I keep finding different ways of doing and saying. There are changes, little ones and I know it's little steps at a time and they all add up but I consistently get one step today and then tomorrow it's all back to the day before. It's hard to stay positive when one day you have one person and the next day it's another and it has nothing to do with anything that's going on.
I would like to explain myself better but I'm out of time today. I'll get back here when I can.
