Joanne, No need to apologize for a negative post, it's what you're feeling. But I do have to tell you that your post brings back all the memories of how YOU used to communicate with your husband. Maybe you've done this already, but I really wish you would re-read our thread again. You were much more realistic and clear about your wishes. I think you've slipped...which might explain why your husband has slipped too.
Look, he will never be you. HE will never have the need to communicate on a deep level all the time. It isn't going to happen. If that's what you need, you're wasting your time. He's him. He's different. You need to get those deeper communication needs met with friends and other family members. Don't put all your communication eggs in one basket.
Plus, sure he's unhappy. He's unhappy because the woman he loves finds most of his behavior unacceptable and shallow. Wouldn't you be unhappy too?
I've worked with lots of couples who have the same pattern as you and your husband. It's frustrating to watch because the husband usually wants to please his wife, but keeps missing the mark.
If you simply can not accept your husband for who he is, you should probably stop hurting him with your criticisms. I see him as a man who wants to please you and love you. I could be wrong. It's hard to read between the lines.
Anyway, you know I care about you Joanne. Please let me know if you have re-read our thread and what you think about it. HAve you stopped being solution-focused? Divorce is always an option, just not a good one. MIchele
