Wow, what a great response. (Although you did not make the distinction, I get your point about my question whether to ask such a question and believe it to be a valid one.)
I am in a classic SSM. I also believe that my W suffers from mild depression (sleeps alot, doesn't enjoy much from life, laughs very little) I would also describe her as a confrontational communicator which makes discussions about our sex life extremely difficult and really non-existent. I respond in the ways described in the book and am having a difficult time finding ways to change my behavior and response to get a different behavior and response from her. I usually keep reminding myself that she is simply not interested and only initiate a few times a month so as not to cause conflict.
We ML about once per month with me always the initiator. She shys away from physical touch and does not respond well to my verbal expressions of love and affection. She simply is not an affectionate person. She is an act of service kind of person.
We have S17 and D15.
I have been having more and more thoughts of Sep. and D as I question whether I can go through the rest of my life in a R with no outward signs of affection (either physical or other) from the person whom I have, up until this point dedicated my life to.
Cetainly there is more to my sitch but for now, that is the nutshell.
