Hi LFL,

I can completely relate to your Tarzan/Jane thing it is quite natural after all. Biology designed us so we would prefer the rugged type and pass those genes on to our sons. It sounds like many of the LDH's have a lot in common, they generally tend to be introverted types with low levels of aggression/assertiveness. That personality type must be tricky as a M and they would have had to go through quite a bit to sort out their identity as males and decide who they are. I think inevitably they will have ditched the Tarzan image pretty quickly as neanderthal, they see themselves as intelligent, sensitive, 21st century guys and after all years of feminism during their formative years has been telling them that that's what women want. And in a way we do, just not in the bedroom is all.

I kind of think we might be instinctivey choosing the right genes by choosing these guys, after all they are the ones that fit in best in the 21st century and more likely to be bringing home the bacon to the little ones than the neanderthals - LOL

I went through a stage recently of not initiating at all with H just cause I was tired of it being me all the time - I wanted to be wanted. I'm glad you had that R talk it will have broken down the barriers. After H and I had our last big R talk things got better in that department. These things are always cyclical I find. Sometimes it's better just to keep initiating, at one point I was initiating about 4 times a week and we were doing great. I did get fed up that he never did, and after my period interrupted that phase we went back to me waiting for him and it never happening.

All I think I'm trying to say is don't put too much weight on who is the initiator - just have sex. If you keep having sex the EC stays good. Once the EC is flowing then it is easier to ask for things like H showing you he wants you once in a while.

take care

Fran

if we can be sufficient to ourselves, we need fear no entangling webs
Erica Jong