When was the last time you felt able to actually just be completely open and free?
Never. That doesn't go over well with H.
what do you think would happen if you just turned over a leaf of being completely honest and direct with your H about your feelings and desires?
I'd probably scare him away for good. That's half-joking. I just don't think he is ready or wants to hear about my "true" feelings. When I have attempted to go there in the past, he shuts down.
Instead of a nudge, what about setting up a date night? Maybe come straight out in the open and say, “Hey H. It seems that we have both been a little caught up and distracted lately so maybe it is time to set aside a little romantic time for us to reconnect? I was thinking maybe we should get a baby sitter, go to dinner on Friday, and then check into this really romantic hotel I read about?”

Come to think of it. We are doing an overnight in another city next month. Almost forgot. All planned by him too. Hope he's not holding out til then though to make his move.
Hmm…I am afraid that I would have to side with your H a little bit here. Personally, I am all for light BDSM such as silk scarves, loosely tied down, no struggle hold down, and other things that imply restraint but do not really force it. Though, if there is any struggle involved that even resembles distress, then game over. Yes….and um, not a chance at hair pulling either. Personally, I don’t want to tie sex and violence. I am guessing that your H probably feels the same way. I am not so sure that your H is being unreasonable here. Thanks for your take in this. And just to clarify, I really have no interest in being tied up or anything having to do with too many props. That would make me feel like I was at his total control and that's not what I'm going for here. I want to feel his bare hands on me in a forceful way. Maybe that is just symbolic of the larger issue of assertiveness in our M.
No hair pulling? I don't mean ripping it out of someone's head. I just mean a slight to medium tug. I don't see what so weird about that.
I don’t want to tie sex and violence. Now you sound like my H. That's a very PC thing to say but the truth of the matter is I don't see it as "violence." Violence is doing something to someone that they do not want done to them (I think). My scenario is different.
Plus Lusty, this topic is a bit more on the advanced side as it requires trust and a deep connection. Well, I agree it's on the advance side but not because it requires trust and deep connection. I did this with OM all the time. I'm sure H is reading into my newfound sexual experimentation with him as a reflection of what I did do with OM, so maybe that is more central to the problem.
No more suppressing! Yes, you definitely need to be true to yourself. There is no point in working out improvements with your H if the improvements don’t actually yield results that you would be happy with. I definitely agree with the wise GEL that you need to be true to yourself and let your real feelings be known. Your H will either learn to accept you as you are or come to the conclusion that he cannot. Either way, you will make progress.
Either I suppress my sexuality or my H thinks I'm a "freak." Gee, which choice to take.