Okee-dokee, the email checking did come up in MC and I mentioned my "random drug screens" in context and H actually laughed about it. A good sign. We talked about several things in MC that I had not mentioned here previously:
(1) H had a CT scan of his head, as his neurologist was concerned about something behind his left eye. He's been having some tactile, overstimulation issues for a while (I may have mentioned this) and was incorrectly diagnosed as ADD. We don't know what it is but have since found out his head CT is clear. Dr has him on anti-seizure medicine for all the synapses firing in his head. He is not manifesting physical seizure symptoms, but the overwhelmed/overstimulated feelings may be treated with this med. We'll know more in a few weeks.
(2) I had suddenly had a bunch of not-good symptoms in the female area, and never have infections 'down there' - therefore was very concerned that H had brought me an unexpected 'gift' from OW. Made a Dr appt for yesterday, and H was feeling like complete sh!t about it. Happily (odd word) it is NOT an STD, just a regular old infection that I have never had before but happens all the time out in the world. So I'm duly medicated and should be fine in a few days. No big deal. But it made us both pause and be concerned about it, and it only re-fueled my hate for the OW, which had been on the back burner for a while now. Re-heated hate & loathing is no fun, especially when it is now disproven as valid. ugh. Still want to hate her some more. Also frustrating b/c I was just feeling really decent about my physical appearance, fitness, desirability as a person, etc. and this was a nice blow to the solar plexus. Temporary, but a blow nonetheless.
On the good side of these health issues (which, hello, we don't have health insurance for, groan), if there is a good side... H was feeling horrible when I brought up the potential for an STD (after I brought up the email issue, same night), but I completely (and sincerely) told him I was not mad at him, thought no less of him, just wanted this cured and gone, whatever it was. And it's true.
So, between CT scans, doctor visits, email checks, and MC session, we have drama for the week covered. Hoping for a pleasant and uneventful weekend & week ahead.
Was going to post some lyrics, but forgot which ones I had in mind. Will post them when I think of it!
Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Is 43:18-19
If it seems slow in coming, wait. It's on its way. It will come right on time. Hab 2:3
