Hi AKF- You can do for you and your children at the same time in many instances. I'm not sure how old your kids are, but mine were just two and almost one when my "nightmare" started. I've learned to take them places and do things with them that before would have seemed undoable or just simply overwhelming. For example, if you like the outdoors and your kids are small, pack the youngest in a backpack carrier and let the older one walk with you at the park, zoo, or aquarium. Outdoor fairs are also good candidates. Tap into family members or identified decent sitters and treat yourself to a night out to do whatever you want to do--the bookstore, a movie, a massage, a haircut, shopping... It's amazing what you can find yourself doing when you adjust the frame of mind and view it all as something that you can have happen with a little bit of planning.
Being good to yourself can come in a culmination of a lot of little things or a couple of bigger things. Think first of what you'd like to do and then of the list of avenues that can possibly make it happen. Then narrow down that list and start doing one by one. The satisfaction will be almost immediate and you'll learn to fall into a pattern of doing nice little things for you that don't necessarily exclude the children in every instance. Many of the most pleasurable things are free too, including a fun visit to a local library that has a good children's section and parent materials to look at while the kids amuse themselves. Put on the old thinking cap and be creative--the benefits are worth the effort and time. Best of luck--Jamie
[This message has been edited by jamie (edited 09-01-2000).]
