Quote: I just can't stand to stay in limbo any longer.
Why not? So ONE more day is one too many?
Quote: I found out about the affair 5 months ago. I have done everything she has asked. I have given her space, went to counseling, even filled out divorce papers together at one point(although we never filed them).
Ok so why not start doing what YOU want to do for a change and why can't that be something OTHER than giving up?
I don't recall reading in DB or DR where we have to do ANYTHING the WAS says to do. Sure, we give them space but you know what, we do that because WE need space from their toxic $hit. We give them time because we KNOW it works for us, not against us. It has NOTHING to do with them and everything to do with us and our goals. So freaking what if it happens to coincide with what they want?
Quote: I can no longer sit back and act as if nothing is going even though I know better. I am tired of her diciding for me this is a choice I am making on my own. I am tired of being controlled.
Good. I am glad you are finally ready to start making choices rather than doing what "she asks". The problem is that you are STILL just reacting to the situation and not because you want something different. You only know you DON'T want the pain and anger anymore so you are doing what seems right. I hope you are right, but as many people here have found out when making such decisions, you may not be right but when you realize that, it's too late to turn back.
Don't act out of fear. Act out of clear understanding of what YOU want and if you don't know exactly what that is, then it's best to hold off on making any decisions until you do. In the end, that's all up to you.
