You really need to read my sitch a little more before spouting off. I don’t think you got one single thing right.
So what you are trying to say is that you are trying to strip your wife of all power?
Where did I ever say this?
So is that the reason for taking her name off bank accounts?
Spending above our means to the extent that credit card debt was growing each year faster than I could pay it.
And taking her name off the vehicle title?
Her name was never on the vehicle my mom gave me since it was a gift and separate property. The other cars are community property.
Also not letting her name be on the property?
Don’t know what you are talking about her. The house is community property. Title in her name cannot be revoked without her consent. A portion of the down payment is separate property. The rest is community property.
I think you are mentally preparing for divorce. You proved that mentality once again when you stated you let your kitchen be an embarassment because in other words you'd be danged then to put any money into the house if she was going to divorce you.
I have already been prepared for divorce. Not putting money into the house makes financial sense.
I think her having that retainer fee has really scared you. The only way you know how to fight back is to show your butt.
The retainer does not scare me. I put up my own retainer too, though almost all of that has been used.
I also find it interesting that you haven't mentioned what you love about your wife? Or what good qualities does your wife have? You haven't even stated I don't believe ever that you love your wife.
No, I never said I love her. We are not to that point yet. I think it will come.
She may not be about power. She may just not want to be intimate with you or get close to you. Your actions have been harsh and probably really pushed her away.
My actions have been harsh, but for good reason. I think she does want to be intimate and get close, but it scares her too much to do so.
Just for the record because this seems like the harshest thing you have done to her but could you clarify why you put her in jail that night? How long did she have to stay in jail?
I called the cops because she assaulted me. She stayed over night. It is not the first time she has been physical either. It drew the line. She crossed it. And guess what, she has shown no tendency to go that far since. She is perfectly capable of holding onto herself and arguing in a civil way, if she wants to. This includes not shutting down, running, distancing, which are also forms of emotional abuse and attempts at control.
Cally, you will not move forward as long as you keep seeing things through your filters. This is what I have been telling you regarding your sitch. You are getting all riled up because you do not understand how my sitch could make sense in your world. That is your biggest downfall, IMO.
I am doing what I think best in regards to how I can best understand my wife and her view of the world. Normally this would mean she come to her own conclusions. But she is stuck in a spot that does not let her move forward or backward. That makes it my issue because I do not want to stay in that stuck spot.
