Hi Everyone- Well, I made it through a second wedding anniversary during this separation from H. He was (still is) on a business trip, like last year, but fortunately this year I got a nice, warm, very long distant telephone call with happy anniversary wishes. Last year I was in tears and waiting for the rings that never came. This year, well, I was, I think ready for anything. I guess it let me be pleasantly surprised in the end and marvel at lower or eliminated expectations.
I still struggle a bit with certain of my family members who inquire where things are going with H and why he hasn't returned home after such a wonderful vacation together. One recent conversation with an older sister left me feeling all stirred up and ready for the old war path re. everything being solved now or, even better, yesterday. Nevertheless, I ended the conversation with my sister in a nice manner and realized that there was little, if anything, that she could relate to in my situation. I know many of you have experienced all of this in dealing with certain friends and family members. Isn't it amazing that such conversations can have us momentarily drift backwards and hurt?
I've read so much on different threads re. the passive aggressive nature of some of our spouses and see so many characteristics that my H possesses. I too have wondered what the interplay is between DB methods and passive aggressive tendencies, along with the interplay of those things in an MLC situation. I think, to a certain extent, I've run out of energy to try too hard to put some labels on all of it, but, at the same time, my personality has me continuing to try to understand more than I currently seem able to. Early on, I read "Living With The Passive Aggressive Man" (author's name escapes me--have book buried in my collection accumulated during the past 2 years) and was discouraged by the overall conclusion that most passive aggressives will not change their ways and that if you're not married or otherwise have a significant stake in the relationship then get out ASAP. Anyone else read the book and walk away with the general sense I just described?
Well, time to get the munchkins out for some fun times. Have a great day--Jamie
