Jen- hope your weekend of reflection helped put things in perspective for you. I do think one's own understanding of their faith and a growing peace with that faith helps considerably. I too am like most people in that we cry out for help when things are desperate and then we forget to nurture that spriritual relationship when things are going well.
In the past, I sometimes got mad at the "unfairness" of my situation and resented depositing love units only to find my account empty. At that point I felt justified to let my anger and resentment rise and I did let this happen on a number of occasions. However, because my faith and my personal relationship with the God I believe in has been extremely important to me, I often looked at my relationship in the light of how faithful I had been to my God. I would come away thinking "yes, I have been wronged" but I have also been unfair to the One who has given me sooo much more. It is that same God who tells me to love and "Dwell with the wife of your youth with understanding." This mindset kept me going and it has paid off.
Would I tell others to keep giving and giving and giving if they are being abused or are being treated like doormats? No, but I would encourage them to find a way to prevent the anger and resentment from building up. Again, just sharing what worked for me.
Weekend update: Going into this weekend getaway with the W and kids, my W admitted she was "hormoning" which potentially made the weekend all the more challenging. Being aware of this, we both worked at minimizing the chance that this would ruin our weekend and the end result was the family had one of the best weekends we have ever had. Some flare ups occured but we worked through them. Blessings be upon each of us as we continue the healing process. C2H
Committed2Him- "C2H" All Things (Back from Spain!)...18
