Wesse, I've never chatted with you before, but boy can I relate. I struggle with these same thoughts and feelings. Alot has improved between W and I and I do give her credit for her changes. However, I wonder about the trust and passion.
I have also tried to imagine if it would be different if I had D'd and started anew. I think not. I think after going thru this that we become slightly jaided in the trust department. At least in the unconditional trust department.
It will be interesting to see how things will change in the future. These past few years have taught me that marriage is constant change. Let's baby step towards making it better.
