Hi Alex!<P> You have been having a rough time.I know how much it hurts to hear the man you've devoted your life to,make such hurtful remarks.<P>However...DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT!<P>You are becoming addicted to the angst of all of this.In other words it is easy to become obsessed day and night about the state of your marriage... to the point where you are neglecting not only your own needs,but those of your children.I DID THE SAME THING!I put my children on the back burner and boy did they resent it and I still see a residual effect of last year's abandonment by the mother they knew and loved.A mother who turned into a person who was on the verge of a breakdown...yes that was me!<BR> Alex...grp therapy was very helpful for me and I hope you are receiveing some help of this nature.<P> You are allowing yourself to be abused emotionally and you must detach from your H's MLC immediately,before you totally burn out.<P> Your H has the luxury of dumping all his selfish adolescent rebellion on YOU!Stop...encouraging that.<P> Alex...you know it is all garbage...don't take him seriously.Don't have ANY OR talks...PERIOD!!!<P> Actions are what you need...your own POSITIVE actions.You will NOT draw him back by having these "heart to heart" discussions about how wonderful other women are!<P> Your H LOVES YOU and just has lost touch with that,at this stage in his life.Back off and let him miss you.Don't ask him what his needs are and certainly don't try to bend over backwards being someone you are not!<P> Read Michel's books again. Get back to basics...quickly.Don't give yesterday a thought..just move on in a positive direction from this moment on.Get back to DBing.It works,Alex,have faith in the techniques.<BR> <BR> Again...I say...DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT!<P> Hugs and PMA to you...Jenny<BR> <p>[This message has been edited by 17baker445 (edited 08-28-2000).]
