It seems like you've been doing a whole lot of things to try and affect her. Forgive me if that's a bad impression but it's the one I get from reading your posts.
You can't stop her from leaving. You can't control her and you have to accept that. All your R talks seem to be of the variety of "if she just understood/heard/believed THIS, then she would not be leaving." I understand the urge to think that way but you have to resist it with all your being. She is NOT crazy, nor WRONG as far as she's concerned so you telling you all the things you've done to "fix" this or that and improve the situation just reinforce to her that you think something needs fixing. She doesn't want to fix anything. She just wants her space and her new, unencumbered life. Understand that and then realize that while you cannot directly control the sitch, you CAN get yourself in a better position to succeed if/when things begin to crack in "wonderland".
You just need to "do" all those things you told her about and stop telling her about them. They're not for her, and they're none of her business. If she wants to ask you about something, then let her. If she doesn't, then fine, but KNOW that she notices and let that be all the comfort you seek in this.
IT DOES SUCK but only as much as you let it. Smile once today and realize that not everything is mired down in this mess. You DO have good things in your life and I urge you to celebrate THOSE things and work to make them even better in the absence of your marriage.
