This is a little off-topic, maybe, but is there anything I could do to help her look inward and examine her own actions? I doubt it will help our marriage at this point, but I'd like to think my son would benefit from it in the long run.
Yes, there is; do it yourself. Set an example both for her and your son.
I have been reading your back and forth with Rob. You seem like you are getting it and that's good because he's giving you some good advice. Just make sure you keep things focused on you. Anytime you find yourself thinking "How do I make her see...do...feel..." stop yourself. You can't MAKE her do anything but you CAN influence how she perceives you by making your own changes and making your OWN happiness in the midst of this crisis. It takes real strength to do that and it will speak to her on a level deeper than anything else you can do.
