Hi Everyone!
It's been a busy couple of days for me as one of my children had a "birthday weekend"... a sleepover w lots of activities Sat and Sun.
For some reason,I felt sad and I really was irritable toward my H.Sometimes..the anguish I felt over the past year and a half comes back and haunts me.I experience a myriad of emotions akin to post traumatic stress syndrome,I am certain.There is always the underlying fear that this could happen again.I hope by acknowledging these feelings here on the board,I will avoid doing damage to my marriage.

Pondering,how nice to hear from you and thank you so much for your words of encouragement...it's been a very long year,hasn't it!I also appreciate all the advice you have given me on the board as it was most helpful.It's been a long year,hasn't it! I hope that you are doing well and that life is exciting and prosperous in every way.

Kathy,thanks for dropping in.You have some wonderful advice for LS that I most certainly agree with.How are you doing?It seems you are rapidly becomming a DB expert!

LS...PLease don't get into OR talks with your very conflicted H.He loves you,I am sure,but he must come to that realization himself.
I made the same mistakes and most likely prolonged our difficulties.It took me about 12 months of DBing to really "get it". I hope it doesn't take tha long for you.Trust what we are telling you.You can not convince or remind your H of ANYTHING right now.
Just listen and commiserate! Detach and validate what you are hearing,but keep your thoughts to yourself.It works!
When your H made the comment about"you love me like a brother"...your response should have been.."so,you think I only love you as a brother?" Listen and repeat.Be a "sounding board",he will come to his own truths soon enough.It's so important that you force him to do that(by keeping quiet),instead of enabling him by interpreting,analyzing and offering your opinion.There will be time for that much later.
Take heart... as he is very tied to you and can't quite figure it out.He's not thinking due to his infatuation w the other woman..

My best to all my friends this evening...Jenny


[This message has been edited by 17baker445 (edited 06-27-2000).]