As always, hate to see you here. That said, man, you have to open your eyes. If you were all that you think you were in this marriage, I doubt there is a woman alive that would have left or "given up" on you. Sorry if that sounds harsh.
I thought that too for about a day after my bombs fell. Before that, I thought it ALL THE TIME. I was the best husband, father, etc. I was THE MAN right up until my W told me she didn't love me anymore and was having an affair.
As RB said, YOU HAVE to get off that pedestal NOW. Everything you put in that email and everything you are posting is from the perspective of someone who is SURE he is righteous and is dealing with a devil woman, bent on doing her evil. That is NOT THE CASE. She is doing what she thinks will make her happy because SHE IS NOT HAPPY in your marriage.
Now, it IS possible that she is 90% responsible for that unhappiness but more likely that you are responsible for a decent amount of it. In DBing, we do not recognize and accept responsibility because we are weak or because our spouses don't have their issues to deal with. We look for our faults in the marriage and address them on a personal level because IT'S ALL WE CAN DO. We can't control them, we can only control ourselves.
SO, with that in mind, one of the worst things to see here is someone who refuses to admit any part in the demise of their marriage because if that is the case, then there is really nothing to work on. If YOU were perfect, or as you say, gave 110%, then you're done. Nothing more to do. You gave it all and then some. Oh, and BTW, if you gave like 110%, then that doesn't leave much for her to do. Maybe you were trying too hard. Maybe you know you put that much effort into it because you did SO many loving things for her all the time. The problem may be that you did things that YOU find to be loving and maybe were missing the mark for her. Something to think about.
Anyway, you need to just realize that no matter how small it seems, you need to find a chink in that armor of yours and look into it to find something you can do better for YOURSELF, something to work on.
You can do this. Just calm down on the superman act and concentrate on you. The bottom line is that you want your W back more than you want to be right...right?
