Ok because I figure she would only read between the lines of my talk with her I made the points plain and clear of what I was trying to say. Did I do wrong by this? For the first time I am at peace with anything she does to me cause I know I did everything even let her go if that's what she wanted. Did I shoot myself in the foot? or do better for the long run?
Quote:
Some things may have gotten misconstrued cause I’m not the best person with words yet. So I will make things short and to the point about what I was trying to tell you.
1. This affair and anything else you do to hurt me isn’t going to bring me down because I am at peace knowing I am filling your every want and need even letting you go no matter how bad that hurts me. I am numb to it now, just like it doesn’t bug me you slept at his house, or whatever you did last night or even the fact you talked to him for 45 minutes while I was gone.
2. I may never be able to forgive you for giving up on me. There are only a couple things I know of that would fix that.
3. I can forgive you for everything but you need to ask me for that forgiveness in order for me to do that. I may not be able to give that forgiveness yet but if it’s sincere I probably would.
4. You say you gave it 110% but you never poured you heart to me to let me see that desire. I am at peace knowing I did that and it didn’t work I must go on and not get down on that I can’t change you.
5. I will be your friend or whatever you want when you want it but I am stopping all your expectations for my needs, wants, and desires. I do have other expectations from you with the kids and other things but none from me.
6. I want you to be happy, and to over these 13-14 years of pain in your life and I hope me letting you go fixes that I don’t believe it will but I honestly hope it does.
7. It will make me happy and will find more piece and forgiveness for it and anything you want me to do to help I will do just ask.
8. I do not want this so I will not be pushing anything forward as far as us breaking up, moving out or divorce except the things I have to do to move my life forward. If you want those things I’m ready to give them to you if that’s what you truly want and need.
I’m sorry if this hurts you but this is the truth, I know your emotionally, physically and mentally exhausted. This is going to be the last conversation about our relationship that I will be striking up until you can talk to me about it. So please you be at peace that you are getting exactly what you want and need. I’m sure someday when you’re ready to talk about it you will. I will be your friend I am a better listener than I ever have been and I won’t judge you for whatever is on your mind.
