At least she is saying to be patient. I'm still getting I'm not ready to work on more in our relationship althoough I guess I should consider what she is doing as some sort of trying. Although I sometimes feel she does most of it out of sympathy or just to keep things looking normal for the kids sake. I know she was ready to end it 2 months ago becasue she has told me so but for some reson she is still holding on and occasionally talks about things in the future like she thinks we will be here together for a long time to come. Oh so confused she is!
The other problem I have and I don't know if you have the same issue or not by my wife was involved with a co-worker for over a year before I found out. When I did find out she said she would end it and wanted to work things out with me. 6 weeks later she dropped the bomb which lead me to believe the OM was still in the picture influencing her descions. How could he not be, she works with him. I've had some sign that she is still in contect with him and the things she has said over the past two month according to DR indicate that the affair still goes on even if just on an emotional level now. She's said 3 out of the four statements listed in DR that indicate this, such as, ILY but I'm not ILWY and I see your changes but its too little too late and just because you have changed doesn't me it will make me want to change my mind. Yet still she has not officially asked for a divorce or a seperation. I try to stay positive but have prepared for the worst.
Today we had a bit of a squable. When I got home today I found my younngest daughter not home as she should have beem. I called my W and asked were she was. She neglected to call me to tell me my daughter had extra practice after school. Since I have been very apologetic and soft spoken the last three months I took a strong stance on her inconsiderate behavior. I needed to let her know that even though I have changed for the better I am not be a pushover either. I didn't say it like that but hadles it very tactfully. She was apologetic so my fear of confronting her wasn't justified. I'll watch for the next several days if my strong stance has any effects on her behavior. LAter that evening another small squable erupted. She had mentioned watching TV together later in the evening. She seemed tired and I assumed she wanted to rest for awhile so I got to work on a window trim project. She appartently had been analyizing my every move since she got home and when I grabbed my tools she drew a conclusion that me asking if she was tired and wanting to crash for awhile and becasue I started working on the window that it meant I didn't want to watch TV with her. I told her I'm sorry if thats what you think I said but thats not what I said, thats what you assumed I was thinking. I told her I refused to argue with her and told her instead of analyizing me and trying to figure out what I am thnking , why not just me whats on your mind. I said if you want to watch TV with me just say so! It would be much easier than analyizing me actions.
