Ronnie I am not going anywhere. I am here for you and check everyday to see how you are. You have sounded so much better lately. Others have commented on how much better and stronger you are. I know it has been the hardest thing you have ever done but you are making wonderful progress.
Not asking questions will be a good 180 for you and your H will notice. It really doesn't matter what he is doing or with whom really. He is on his own personal journey just as we all are. As you said in one of your post. You have to fix you while he tries to sort out and fix himself. Only then will the two of you be able to work on fixing your marriage.
If your H is going through some kind of MLC he will eventualy come out of the tunnel. What he has not had a chance to learn yet is that every relationship he has is going to end up in the same place unless he figures out that what he is looking for has always been right there at home. Unfortunatley these H's won't take our word for it and have to find out for themselves. I have come to believe that most of them do eventualy figure it out.
One of the big questions is that will he figure it out before you give up on him and build a new life? When he does figure it out will you still want him? You might not believe it now but when you have fixed you and found some peace and happiness without him is when he is going to decide he wants to come home. It is then that you will have to decide if you really want to give him the power to do this to you again 5 years from now? You are on your own personal journey right now. Take it one day at a time and make each day the best it can be. The future will take care of itself. None of us knows for sure what tomorrow will bring anyway. So each morning when you wake up count your blessings and focus on your PMA. You are going to be all right.
You are a wonderful person Ronnie and what has happened is your H's fault and not anything that you did or didn't do. It was his decision and like me you were not consulted in the decision making process. Give him time and keep working on the detaching.
If there is any majic formula around here it would have to consist of patience, time, and detaching. Those three things seem to work better than anything else. Get a good nights sleep and I will back tomorrow.
PS. I think you have made some very good decisons lately. I am thinking of the one you made to not do anything until after the weddings and then to stall until you are ready or force your H to be the one to eventualy file and have to wait a year. A lot can and will happen in a year.
