Yup I am pissed. No way around it. But I also can recognize it and find the source of the anger. That source is within me. It originates in me and I know I have to own it and deal with it.
As to repeated emails, they were of the nature of the schedules of our kids. They were not pursuit emails. If I call, she is busy why call. If I email, I hate emails do not email. Yet the nature of this was coverage of our kids. I could not just make a decision because it affected her having to take them, do do otherwise is to not respect her job.
The issue of space is from my experience. Take tehm from what they are worth or how you see them.
As to being smug, the rearranging of my schedule was at her request, and done so b/c she asked it of me. It was made as a point where she claims I have no respect or understanding of her job, yet when I accomodate her wishes it is deemed as a necessity. I do not expect her to rearrange her schedule. Again the issue of kids came from her needing a change due to her job. Maybe not enough information relayed explaining that dynamic.
Cobra, I have made my share of mistakes, I have made my share of missteps, but I do feel that you make to great of an assumption with the statement of I am just talk. I am not the perfect person that can do this I am human. I do take offense to that statement but you are entitled to it.
There is no expectation of running back. I do not see myself stating that or implying that. I am stating that the non-verbal language being communicated was the issue at hand. Act the way you wish, is her statement, I do and get hammered. I do not I get hammered. This is not a push for self-destruction, it is trying not to be caught in the damned if you do and damned if you dont.
My agenda is simple Cobra, to get to the point where we can both honestly address the issues at hand. Simlar to you having your long, drag out sessions with your wife. I know that you are probably more further along in the process and your relationship is a bit more stable, but that is my agenda. To have honest dialog and quit the placating responses only to have one or the other break that response through their actions.
Again, I do not believe that I am ablt to do this alone. I see MC being a very needed thing. Not only for W but, to call me on my behavior.
Through honest giving of my love I will recieve 10 fold in return.
Just because a person does not love you in the way you want, does not mean they do not love you!
