Thank you so much John for the words of inspiration. This site too has kept me going through the rough times. I see very troubled waters ahead with no land in site.
My husband visited last night and our son had a terrible reaction to him. He's now 14 months old and had been napping. My H went to wake him up and the poor child flipped out. I truly believe he's so used to mommy being with him that my H (also named John) scared him, he's starting to view my H as someone who takes him away from mommy. The child screamed for more than an hour anytime my H came near him and I had to carry him around the house to calm him. My H kept saying it was no big deal, trying to say this would happen even if he were there at home. It made a tense evening.
Anyway, the reason I'm going on and on is that although there appeared to be a breakthrough, no progress is being made. I'm starting to detach and move on in a sense. I find myself treating him like a visitor, last night I didn't walk him to the door as I have in the past. He sometimes is too tired to visit our son and makes no overtures towards friendly activities or conversation with me unless I initiate it. I feel like I teeter on the edge of last resort.
Can you give me any pointers as to how to proceed?? I am happy with myself around him and have a loving relationship with our son. I think in some way he feels as if an outsider unless he has our son to himself. I resent bouncing this child back and forth but know it could become his future if I take a miss-step. Thank you-please keep up the encouragement. I'm currently under separated.
